Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Message to large Seals
Elephant Seals are the largest of all seals. They live in cold waters and breed on the shores of Southern Argentina. Male elephant seals can be as much as six metres long
Is that right? Well, I've only got one thing to say to you then, Elephant Seals. If you can grow six metres long, why the fuck don't you grow a pair of legs, get the fuck out of the ocean and evolve, you vast, honking, non- fish, sea- dwelling cunts.
Noreen
Is that right? Well, I've only got one thing to say to you then, Elephant Seals. If you can grow six metres long, why the fuck don't you grow a pair of legs, get the fuck out of the ocean and evolve, you vast, honking, non- fish, sea- dwelling cunts.
Noreen
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Seal has legs!
It is his fish-hook face that hasn't evolved.
Positively pre-Cambrian.
It is his fish-hook face that hasn't evolved.
Positively pre-Cambrian.
# posted by 
: 5:37 PM
: 5:37 PM
Because then you'd bitch and complain they aren't walking fast enough. Perhaps they should evolve stiletto heels instead of tusks just to piss you off.
# posted by : 7:11 PM
: 7:11 PM 
Mmmmmmm, elephant seals.
When you're that big, you don't need to evolve; you just shit on everyone else around you. That's what we Americans do. Someone should give those seals the fucking Medal of Honor, and paint them red, white, and blue.
When you're that big, you don't need to evolve; you just shit on everyone else around you. That's what we Americans do. Someone should give those seals the fucking Medal of Honor, and paint them red, white, and blue.
Perhaps they like living in the sea and staying away from all the americans and other assorted cunts you see hanging around on land.
In fact, I might go for a nice long swim now.
In fact, I might go for a nice long swim now.
# posted by : 10:39 AM
: 10:39 AM
Have you never heard of Seal, the singer? That's what the put the rest of em off the old evolution thingy. Same goes for bushes, moss, and hens (Tim).
That's the first time I've ever seen the word "genital" in the singular. Does it even have meaning, or is it like "trouseers"?
# posted by : 2:12 PM
: 2:12 PM
I NOTE WITH INTEREST THAT IT IS POSSIBLE FOR HUMANS TO FUCK ELEPHANT SEALS STOP THIS SUGGESTS WE MAY BE ABLE TO HELP THEM EVOLVE STOP DOES ANYONE WANT TO GET TOGETHER FOR A TRIP TO ARGENTINA STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP
# posted by : 7:26 PM
: 7:26 PM
Apologies for off-topicy-ness, but some knobber's just offered me forty quid (valuing the muppet readership at eight quid each, twats) to link to an insurance company. Have you had any such spasticity to deal with?
Btw, weird thing about yer Seal? Actual Seal; mam was, anyway.
Btw, weird thing about yer Seal? Actual Seal; mam was, anyway.
Elephant seals must have legs. There used to be one at the St. Louis Zoo. How the hell did he get that far inland, unless he walked there?
And don't tell me he swam up the Mississippi. No one swims in the Mississippi. The signs are clearly posted.
And don't tell me he swam up the Mississippi. No one swims in the Mississippi. The signs are clearly posted.
My guess is that they choose not to evolve as they are embarassed by that fucking scrotum on their faces.
"Oh really, they got the name because it looks like a trunk?" Piss off. Ugly is ugly.
"Oh really, they got the name because it looks like a trunk?" Piss off. Ugly is ugly.
actually, that's brilliant. Thank you. I'm going to pass that on to a couple of people.
# posted by : 10:20 AM
: 10:20 AM
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