Emerald Bile

In the light of my relationship wisdom and brilliant observations on male/female mating patterns, I would like to add another few thoughts- on the foolish mistake women make of picking ugly husbands, in the hope that their minging men won't be able to get the ride off other women. This tactic works really well for a few years - but as the partnership grows older, and the man gets older and possibly richer, more powerful or succesful in whichever way, the range of women available to him gets greater. At the same time the tolerance of interloping women to his really quite unfortunate or plain face becomes much greater. Even things like large moles with hairs, terrible skin, a lazy eye - they can all be filed under "charm" or "rakish" by a really desperate husband-grabbing whore, and where a reasonable looking man won't need the ego trip quite so much, because he may be used to getting the eye off women, being paid the occasional compliment, and so might therefore be able to keep it in his trousers, a hideous man will not pass up the opportunity, for fear that he may never get the chance again.

The same thing happens to women who were ugly teens, in their later twenties. They begin to solicit sexual attention from men, whenever they get the chance. Take this one woman I knew, who was pretty-ish, but a few years previously had looked almost identical to Doris Schwartz from Fame. After relaxing the old hair, contact lenses, losing a ton of weight and teetering around in those shoes girls with thick ankles wear, simpering away at men - she started to get some male attention. But dear God, it went to her head so! I caught her bending forward and fluttering her eyelids at a man who was at least ninety and quite certainly a mong. Now I am not saying that she was a pervert with a taste for old fellers or the simple, just that if it were male - she wanted it to fancy her. Silly bint.

Anyway my point it that there is no insurance in punching below your weight. An ugly man is more dangerous than a handsome one as his vanity will know no bounds. Ugly women will try and steal other women's men more often than the beautiful - because the challenge of being chosen above someone else feeds their hungry and long-ignored egos, and what is more, the attached are often forced to shag uglier people than normal because they can't be all that choosy - since all they can offer is the odd fumble in a shit hotel, a few excruciating "if things were different" conversations and the occasional grope under the table. The same goes for the short - watch them like hawks and don't marry them. Short men are trouble and short women have to get into everyones line of sight by being either really fucking loud and bouncy and annoying or by crying a huge amount and sucking the life out of those of a decent stature. That is all.
Noreen