Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Do NOT go ugly early
The same thing happens to women who were ugly teens, in their later twenties. They begin to solicit sexual attention from men, whenever they get the chance. Take this one woman I knew, who was pretty-ish, but a few years previously had looked almost identical to Doris Schwartz from Fame. After relaxing the old hair, contact lenses, losing a ton of weight and teetering around in those shoes girls with thick ankles wear, simpering away at men - she started to get some male attention. But dear God, it went to her head so! I caught her bending forward and fluttering her eyelids at a man who was at least ninety and quite certainly a mong. Now I am not saying that she was a pervert with a taste for old fellers or the simple, just that if it were male - she wanted it to fancy her. Silly bint.
Anyway my point it that there is no insurance in punching below your weight. An ugly man is more dangerous than a handsome one as his vanity will know no bounds. Ugly women will try and steal other women's men more often than the beautiful - because the challenge of being chosen above someone else feeds their hungry and long-ignored egos, and what is more, the attached are often forced to shag uglier people than normal because they can't be all that choosy - since all they can offer is the odd fumble in a shit hotel, a few excruciating "if things were different" conversations and the occasional grope under the table. The same goes for the short - watch them like hawks and don't marry them. Short men are trouble and short women have to get into everyones line of sight by being either really fucking loud and bouncy and annoying or by crying a huge amount and sucking the life out of those of a decent stature. That is all.
Not based on my own husband, sorry to disappoint - a friend went ugly early and her old man has been an idiot and buggered off in search of fuel for his vanity. This post is for her.
Ah ha ha you are mad, most entertaining. Not disappointed, I’m glad it is not based on your husband. Perhaps marrying someone in a wheelchair might be an idea, they’d never get away!
Fat kids = sluts as adults
Men with balding dads = don't breed with as male children will blame you forever.
Men with ugly dads = see above
Men shorter than me (5'2", no i'm not a loud or a cryer either) = who wants a pixie for a husband?
Men who don't like food = Not worth my time and usually they're a shit shag because they have no energy.
Any man who says "i do this job" as an opening line when i meet them can also fuck off.
Men who get their hair dyed = Fuck off
Men who want any woman to be a kept wife = Please fuck off i am not a doormat
And to be fair to said bint, she did do me a favour. She is now stuck with him whilst I have realised that I was punching well below my weight all those years, am and now dating (read as shagging) lots of aesthetically pleasing men, most of which happen to be younger than me. Its a tough life.
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